Its been too long

Hola! Guten Tag! Bonjour! Bonjourno! etc etc. Hello and welcome back to all the readers of my blog - its been to long - far too long.

To kick off - Happy Belated B'day John - I know I miss it every year, but what to do - I cannot understand the need for you to leave the security of your mom's womb bang in the middle of exam season!

Today (although it still feels like yesterday) kicked off in a very auspicious manner - wasp deconservation. The UK Law Society's Gazette is not a good option (mental note to myself has been made - tehelka, tehelka, tehelka)

Shreyas did the unthinkable yesterday - haircut. But that's not the end of it - I shall elaborate:

I wake up like its any other morning, but realise it isn't for two reasons. One, its the first day after the exams have ended (the lower back pains have consequently reduced to a great extent), and second, I know I'm going to get a haircut this morning. I slowly drain the relatively empty cup of coffee provided as part of morning rations, taking several breaks from the TOI to admire the hair and run my fingers through it for the last few minutes before the death knell is sounded.

I mournfully walk out the front door and try to calm and comfort myself with the only thing that can at a time like this - Smells Like Teenspirit. The Wallace lift also experiences considerable headbanging (one last time again). As the train leaves Marine Lines and commences the 3 minute trudge to Churchgate, I can almost feel a tear running down my cheek and then realise its a guy washing his hands and generally making a nuisance of himself. His botlle (and very nearly a large part of his body too!) was shown the traditional Bombay courtesy for depositing unsolicited water on others in a season other than the monsoons.

I walk in to the barber's saloon and take the seat shown to me and find myself in half a mind to get up punch the guy holding the door open in the face and running back home. (the punch part is really just a post -exam stress buster!) The barber comes in, already cursing his luck for getting to cut my hair and begins his work. I say "chhota, crew cut". He begins using the scissors, then stops - turns to the mirror and with this pleading look in his eyes, yet in an authoritative voice asks, "machine isthamal karoon?" I ask hi how long the remnants of that operation will be and he holds up one and a half phalanges. I thought to myself and then said "thik hai - magar choti nahin chahiye" He was almost kissing my feet at this stage.

And so it began! This is a procedure that a good friend of mine goes through everytime he visits the barber and I now appreciate the benefits of it - quick, pain and effort free. 6 minutes and I go from neanderthal to Panchen Lama (who turned 16 some days back - Happy Birthday to him too) Not to show off that he hasn't done any work, the barber follows Air-Cool's strict procedure and brings out the mirror to show me the back of my head - I give him this dude-are-you-mocking-me-and-if-you-are-no-tip-for-you expression and make the appropriate grunting sounds that signify a thumbs up.

For an estimate of what I look like now - check the photo labelled twins in my last blog!!!

Anyway - now I have too much to think about what with the finals of the Champions League to be contested in Istanbul between an Italian and an English club - I cannot believe how good Paolo Maldini remains even at this age - he still keeps up with the best of them - I would just love to see him lift the European trophy one more time.

Anyway - here's the sign off line for today:

"Your father is rich, he's the judge, he's the man,
he's the God that got your sentence reduced
But in the back of his mind, he well knows what
he'd find if he looked a little deeper in you"

Pantera (Drag the Waters off Great Southern Trendkill) - for all the judges who are going to commute my sentence when I commit my first cognizable crime!